emotions...

there are so many emotions going through my body right now....



We are driving towards Phoenix so that Autumn, Patrick, & I can board a plane to fly to Wisconsin to go see my mom & Wayne. The kids are sooo excited to get on an airplane since they this will be there first time. They have a million questions and it's kinda funny to listen to them. :) They can't wait to see Grampa and hope that he is doing ok.



I am a nervous wreck! I am scared of what I will face at mom's house. I know Wayne is sicker than when I saw him 3 months ago and that is hard to deal with. This could be the last time we see him until we get to heaven. :( I am going to make the most of the time we have...



I'm also nervous about being away for so long. I feel like I left so many things undone at home and Harold will have to take care of them. He will have so much to do before he, Ryan, & Jessica leave to drive up. It's hard not to be there to take care of things and help them get ready. I have to let it go and know that it will get worked out.



I've also had to leave my best friend in San Diego. I know we will talk every day but it's not the same since I won't be able to just have time to sit with her and talk. We have such a unique relationship and know what the other is thinking without talking. It's scary but so great!!



I'm glad it will be dark on the airplane and that the kids will probably fall asleep...I can cry and get some things out before I get to WI.